Black Love making

Stop Swiping and join the #1 Award Winning premier Black Dating and Matchmaking site connecting Real Singles for Real Connections. People Images & Pictures. Make something awesome With D.L. Hughley, Ladonna Hughley, Kevin Fredericks, Melissa Fredericks. Highlights love stories from the black community and seeks to find secrets to making a marriage work. Features love stories from some successful people in entertainment as well as everyday couples, each offering a unique take on love. Black Men Making Love To White Women Pictures, Images and Stock Photos. Browse 484 black men making love to white women stock photos and images available, or start a new search to explore more stock photos and images. {{filterDisplayName(filter)}} Duration. Clear filters. Newest results . From the Black Love docu-series to BlackLove.com, we aim to be the hub for Black couples and singles looking to build community and conversation around healthy relationships at every stage of life. We are highlighting our Black Love stories and creating content focused on us, because seeing our love represented appropriately matters. #BlackLove If you are white looking for an African-American woman to fall in love with or you are a black man looking for an Asian lady to fall in love with, then you are at the right place. We have matched plenty of people over the past years of our existence, and we have many success stories that lasted a lifetime. Find the perfect black model love making stock photo. Huge collection, amazing choice, 100+ million high quality, affordable RF and RM images. No need to register, buy now! Black Men Making Love To White Women stock videos and footage. Browse 80 black men making love to white women stock videos and clips available to use in your projects, or start a new search to explore more stock footage and b-roll video clips. {{filterDisplayName(filter)}} Duration. “Black Love,” from filmmakers Codie Elaine Oliver and Tommy Oliver (“The Perfect Guy”) and Confluential Films, seeks to answer the burning question, “What does it take to make a marriage work?” “Black Love” dives into how love begins while showing the reality of what life-long love looks like and offers proof that while it can ... Five dynamic black women in New York City embark on a journey to uncover why they can't find love. Five dynamic black women in New York City embark on a journey to uncover why they can't find love. ... S 1 E 2 Making Lemonade Out of Lemons. S 1 E 3 Bringing Sexy Back. See All. Read the Bios. Monet Bell.

Tabletop Crafters Guild

2019.09.25 15:55 trashtho Tabletop Crafters Guild

Welcome to the unofficial Tabletop Crafters Guild subreddit!
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2016.12.27 04:05 TheDStudge PrequelMemes - Memes of the Star Wars Prequels

Memes of the Star Wars Prequels
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2010.07.28 20:04 ChocolateGiddyUp Art By Cut-Out

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2020.09.20 10:05 haydayhi All the people are dumb even me

No matter who you are what you do or how you behave you will do dumb mistakes or misunderstand or do something really fucked up (which is not fucked up from your perspective). And people will blame you for it just because they want to win or hate. I am so fucking done with people who are stereotyping racism pedophiles to just normal people who are kind to kids or white man who was angry for black man or reverse. Most of the people in society are kind of nice do you know that ? Like wtf is your problem stop fucking make everything political or serious just because it's kind of triggering from your perspective cause most of the time it's you who has the problem and you are a dumb bitch. Stop fucking hating everything just cause you want to be self righteous bitch. God fucking dammit.
Ok for the ladies and gentlemen:
  1. You can't decide something or some scenario is bad based on only one side. I know it's hard to do in internet cause it shows only that part but question the possibilities more before writing "OMG How could they do this to a child OMFG so pedo" or "Fuck that cop for assaulting that black man".
  2. It's okay to make mistakes and be wrong so don't worry about being wrong learn from your mistakes and accept the upgrade. You being wrong means you now know the right and can change your perspective now. What matters is now not past.
  3. And please stop making everything racism, sexist, pedo, boomer thing. Everything is in a line there is no good and bad there is only more good and less good or you can look at it more bad and less bad. If you make everything to a extreme then everyone who like playing with or love children are pedo, those who hate someone from other race is racist, every old person who wants to guide young people will be kaamer???(karen boomer ?).
submitted by haydayhi to rant [link] [comments]


2020.09.20 09:33 netfire4 Newby AV Install Advice a 2000 dodge conversion van goes Alpine...?

Newby AV Install Advice a 2000 dodge conversion van goes Alpine...?
* **What are your goals for your car audio system - as loud as possible (SPL)? Sound quality (SQ)? Some combination of both? Describe to us how you want your system to sound.**
SQ > SPL
* **What vehicle? - year, make, model, type (coupe, sedan, SUV, truck, etc.)**
2000 dodge ram van 1500, conversion, explorer edition.
I love my funktion and I wish I could have heard them more lately I would like ot properly power them for a short concert on the van alone.

https://preview.redd.it/2aaa6uyu29o51.jpg?width=4032&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=5c9b8e6b45980cb6d535ad5617c3292bf3d9c350
https://preview.redd.it/oitmoxyu29o51.jpg?width=4032&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=7c7d9ae2887cc68de2db213fa1d08384d884939c
I want to put a ported single 15\" I have already purchased for this purchase back here and wanted to increase the height of the rear seat a few inches to as much as a foot to accommodate this.
https://preview.redd.it/pt0vrsejs8o51.jpg?width=4032&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=06744555c1c765acb0185b0a94e1890125cf6907
again I still want this to work but I am willing to move the folding bed up to a full foot higher on risers to accommodate the ported 15\" I want to put in here.
Ive ordered a XS D3400 to replace this stock group 34 battery.
Ive ordered a mechman 240 which is what was available for my old saddle mount with the knowledge that I might need an additional alternator
* **What is your maximum budget?**I have much what I think will be required already and I do not think budget will stand in the way of what I want to build.
* **Will you be installing the gear or are you going to a shop? If a shop is doing the work, does your budget include the cost of labor?**With experience with professional audio(not car) and with experience as a mechanic I am confident in my ability to install the equipment myself.
I am in the process of doing so, but since I understand what I am doing I am confident driving the car around in intermediate states of disrepair and do not largely need it for weeks.
* **What gear is in your existing system? (Is it stock? List any aftermarket gear.)**
Existing av gear is from 2000 replacing most if not all.Towards this end I have already purchased:Stinger SPG35 500A relay ( https://www.ebay.com/itm/Stinger-SGP35-High-Current-Power-Relay-Battery-Isolator-500-Amps-Car-Audio/193653046989? )Stinger hpm fuse distribution block https://www.ebay.com/itm/STINGER-SHD823-HPM-MINI-FUSE-2-0ga-or-4ga-to-2-0ga-or-4ga-DISTRIBUTION-BLOCK/362459085336?Stinger inline fuse holder https://www.ebay.com/itm/Stinger-HPM-Series-Inline-Fuse-Holder-150A-Fuse-Included-Car-Audio-Subwoofer-Amp/133471252539?Stinger ANL fuse holder https://www.ebay.com/itm/Stinger-ANL-Fuse-Holder-200Amp-Lot-of-2/392842070707?Stinger fused distribution block https://www.ebay.com/itm/Stinger-Fused-Distribution-Block-Multi-Gauge-Midi-Style-Fuses-HPM-Expert/193653889868?
4* Perko Switches dual battery various ( https://www.ebay.com/itm/4-Perko-Sudbury-Dual-Battery-Selectors-Switch-Fishing-Boat-RV-Semi-1-2-On-Off/353169828499? )
Hydrolic cable crimpersdielectric greaseCopper ends of varying sizes and fuses to fit the above wire.~25 ' of blue,black 0 gauge~100' of blue,black 4 gauge~100 of blue, black 8 gaugeA spool of 14 gauge blue,black speaker wireMechman 240 A Alternator (https://www.ebay.com/itm/Mechman-240-Amp-Alternator-DODGE-JEEP-3-9L-5-2L-5-9L-8-0L-1992-2003-6-Phase/193456223309?)
xs power D3400(same group as my battery)(https://www.ebay.com/itm/XS-Power-D3400-3300-Amp-AGM-Power-Cell-Car-Audio-Battery-Terminal-Hardware/303519087129?)500f Maxwell supercapacitor bank https://www.ebay.com/itm/MAXWELL-super-capacitor-16V-500F-car-battery-12V-rechargeable-battery-power-bank/353142498957?Stinger 5 farad supercapacitor https://www.ebay.com/itm/Stinger-SPC505-Pro-Hybrid-5-Farad-Capacitor-Unique-Industrial-Styling-Black/283997398993

Alpine ilx W650 (https://www.ebay.com/itm/Alpine-iLX-W650-Digital-Multimedia-Receiver-with-Apple-CarPlay-and-Android-Auto/174416152060? )Metra 70-1817Alpine UTE-73bt (https://www.ebay.com/itm/Open-Box-Excellent-Alpine-In-Dash-Digital-Media-Receiver-Built-in-Blueto/203042291745? )Alpine PXE 0850S (https://www.ebay.com/itm/ALPINE-PXE-0850S-Universal-Wireless-Digital-Signal-Processor-w-31-Band-EQ-Remote/303606839931? )
4 * Alpine BBX-1200.4 ( https://www.ebay.com/itm/Alpine-BBX-F1200-4-Channel-Amplifier-BBX-F1200-Designed-for-Europe-This-new-BBX/274469349246? ) (at least the 6x9's get to run A+ B- bridged)Orion CBT 45004 ( https://www.ebay.com/itm/Orion-CBT45004-Cobalt-4-Channel-Amplifier-4500-Watts-Max/233685578541? ) (I know its junk but its AB?)
Alpine SPR-10TW * 2 (https://www.ebay.com/itm/Alpine-SPR-10TW-1-Component-Tweeter-1-inch-Car-Tweeters-Type-R-Alpine-Tweete293696940378 )Alpine 30MC(dash speakers?) ( https://www.ebay.com/itm/2-Alpine-30MC-50W-RMS-3-Midrange-Component-Car-Audio-Speake303524896616? )Alpine S-S50 ( https://www.ebay.com/itm/Pair-ALPINE-S-S50-170-Watt-5-25-5-1-4-Coaxial-2-Way-Car-Audio-Speakers/254689913870? )Alpine R-s69c(for rear 3/4) ( https://www.ebay.com/itm/ALPINE-R-S69C-2-300-Watt-6x9-Car-Audio-Component-Speakers-w-1-Tweeters/392930492845? )Alpine R-s69 front door speakers ( https://www.ebay.com/itm/Alpine-R-S69-Coaxial-2-way-speaker-system-No-Grills/174275100946?s )2* Alpine SWR-1042D 10" ( https://www.ebay.com/itm/2x-Alpine-SWR-1042DType-R-10-subwoofer-with-dual-4-ohm-voice-coils-car-subs-174415176207? )Dc audio 15" Lv5 ( https://www.ebay.com/itm/DC-AUDIO-Level-5-15-2-ohm-Dual-Voice-Coil-Subwoofer-3500-7000-Watt/193657460538? )
Viper DS4VP ( https://www.ebay.com/itm/New-Viper-DS4-Remote-Start-System-Bluetooth-And-Security-DS4VP-Updated-Picture/153987615899? )Viper VSM 450 ( https://www.ebay.com/itm/Viper-VSM450-Smartstart-GPS-Unopened-Factory/353185536382? )Viper 7857V remote ( https://www.ebay.com/itm/Viper-7857V-2-Way-Recharge-LED-Remote-Control-1-Mile-Range/114359963851? )Viper universal harness adaprter ( https://www.ebay.com/itm/DIRECTED-UNIN1-DS4-DS4-UNIVERSAL-REMOTE-START-AND-SECURITY-HARNESS/264547894296? )
Plastic replacement door clips for my vehicle( https://www.ebay.com/itm/Dodge-Ram-1500-2500-50-PCS-Door-Panel-Retainer-Clips-For-1998-2001-Free-Shipping/184403249708 )
I left the most important for last,I got a few boxes of noico 80 mil butyl, that I expect to buy more of,Noico red foam to go over this, aluminum tape and noico 80 mil on the inner skins as well.As I was doing this yesterday I left these pictures till lastish.Also super happy to foam things to stop rattle and liberal use of liquid nails to do the same.
Part way done with passenger door install.

https://preview.redd.it/osnno1pa19o51.jpg?width=3024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=c7534a67c8bbda30c526220a7edfbf63fe8cfab7
I put the door panel back together with the new speaker installed and more foam in the middle layers on both(should have taken more pictures of this step...)
https://preview.redd.it/585kmmzl69o51.jpg?width=3024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=02ab63114506fe2c368dc27ea5f9643b8d268e44
But its not like things are exactly assembled at the moment, looking for a good place for the amp village and how everything is wired so its apart at present like this:
https://preview.redd.it/snnrcnxv69o51.jpg?width=4032&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=6e5b237e80d822feec32b87a9e7820ee682a491c
https://preview.redd.it/n2govbnz69o51.jpg?width=4032&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=09ac9e60f61117a416e9ecf302ccce1a26879e8e
https://preview.redd.it/f3chr0h279o51.jpg?width=3024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=ca2d6d43737755cf726d390a8003d1da31a2238b
https://preview.redd.it/jg5lhr4679o51.jpg?width=4032&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=45551db64a2291128033014e426cf19ba71a3f62
I think I should rebuild these whole quadrants to better contain the 6x9's and probably the alpine 10\" too.
* **What is your country of purchase? Leave any finishing thoughts here.**Few Conversations and questions I have:I would like to connect the ilx w650 and the pxe 0850s digitally, and I was also wondering if there is any way to haave the head unit recognize the processor to expose the additional channels?What is the best way to integrate the rear single din head unit with the front one?
Any Advice on amplifier mounting locations for my vehicle?Alpine 10" subwoofer usage on a 6th order box to be built in the photographed corners? (Crossovers? 100hz - 500hz ?)With the dc audio taking the infra lows, from 20-100 hz in a fourth order band pass box of maximum dimension 40x22x20 where height is hardest, and every inch means the bed is a little closer to the ceiling.
I have some additional that I will follow with in the thread, including possible subwoofer cabinet math I am looking for feedback on.
Thank you for any advice!
submitted by netfire4 to CarAV [link] [comments]


2020.09.20 09:30 oop_and_groose The Squirrel Girl's story theory

So before we start, lets about the reference material I used to identify if me and my friend's theories are right or wrong.
So in RDR's Q&A video, RDR's favorite book is The Origin of Species, which is a Korean novel that focuses on the character Eugene, who lost 2 of his family members in a family trip accident. Her "aunt", who is a psychiatrist, prescribes Eugene with a unidentified medicine. Eugene cut off the prescribed medicine at the age of 16. It seems that the drugs make Eugene helpless. Pretty disturbing right? Oh, and multiple rules that her mother made seems to make Eugene lmited.
Now, the 2nd reference is the colors on every characters clothes. "Why?", you ask. Its pretty simple tbh. In RDR's Animation Process video, the 2nd process is finding the suitable color for the Main Character's clothes (including side characters, I think) and the color of the atmosphere. In each meme, the main character's clothing colors changes. Each color the characters wore have a meaning. For Example: Red means angedangelove. Whilst Green means safety/harmony/tranquility.
Alright, since we got our references in identifying if me and my friend's theory is right, lets get straight to the 1st meme video.
Two Time
Theory: The girl holding the candy, is her "aunt". In the meme, the candy pops up multiple times throughout the meme. In a scene where the pill turns into a candy shows that her "aunt", is drugging her through candies. This explains the scene where she lies next to the vending machine staring at the night sky. When she was attending school, she met two friends, who dies afterwards. The girl with glasses died beacause of the depression. Her depression was caused by the pressure of her family forcing her to be the #1 student of the school. While the other one died of poisoning (important later). There's a few frames of her friends dead with a telephone on her desk colored yellow. The kid with the glasses' clothes are green, thus indicating that she was at peace when she died. While the other kid dies with saliva dripping out of her mouth, indicating that she was poisoned because the general symptoms of poisoning includes the victim producing more saliva than normal.
In an another scene, you can see two windows with black ribbons hanging on them. This is the Korean way of indicating if a person passed away. This means that her real parents died. There is also a scene where she ate with two people. Either they are her relatives or they are her brothers that died afterward because of an accident, but it's still unidentified because in the next scene, she bashed the boy using the trash he used to throw away her pet hamster.
In the chorus scene, you can see her "aunt" with a window saying "stay friends". Either she found out (which explains the telephone) or she found out she's drugging every candy she give to her. Then the next scene shows the "aunt" holding a yellow hair (which is the color of her friend that died due to poisoning) with blood on her face.
Unsolved Mysteries: 1. The girl with the yellow hair wearing the No. 1 medal. 2. The bathtub scene (where her hair turns pink/red due to the events that happened). 3. The donut, ghost and tie scene. 4. Reason of her "aunt" poisoning poisoning her yellow-haired friend.
Ghost Town
Theory (by JustWill): This is a story of a girl who is trying to move on. The pink haired girl (which I will call P), when she was still a student, had a white haired friend (which I will call W) who loved drawing very much. P was attracted by W's love for drawing, and they both drew together. Little did they know P had more talent than W; whenever there was a competition, the first place belonged to P. P didn't know, however, that W was quite obsessed with becoming #1. W's jealousy and resentment for P grew more and more, and in the end, she hung herself. Several years have passed, and P still can't forget about W's death. It still haunts her at night, and she still believes she is the one who killed the innocent W. One day, P receives a letter and a map; a letter that says there is a GhostTown which will allow you to meet the dead once more. Without hesitation, P drives over, carrying the #1 medal she won long ago with her.
As she traverses the GhostTown, P re-lives her past emotions. How shocked she was back then, how she just wanted W to be alive and be her friend, and how she wanted to apologize to her. And so, P finally faces W, with all these in mind.
P wants to shake hands with W, and move on from the past. W, however, was not interested in either being friend with P, or the #1 medal. W reveals her true self; a ghost with black eyes that only has resentment and bitterness. W slowly chokes P while P is suffering from nightmare of her past. The ghost of W simply wanted P dead and that was all. Realizing this at the last moment, P smacks W's head with the #1 medal. Even if W is bleeding from both the head and the eyes, P simply carries the #1 medal, leaves the area, while throwing W a nice middle finger. As she is driving off with the bloodied medal, she thinks back on her past once again while smoking. And when P finally made her resolution, she reveals herself that she, too, is just as resentful and bitter, much like the ghost of W.
City Love (red) Now this is where everything comes together Theory: There's a scene where you can see her "aunt" as a reporter with a large pill-filled poison bottle behind her. There's also a morse code which means GRAIE, but it's still unidentified what it means. The poison behind her must have been used to kill her yellow-haired friend in Two Time.
There's also a scene where the girl with glasses discuss something. There's a figure that looks like a ghost and a crossed out 1 with a happy face leading to it (maybe that explains why she choked the main character instead of forgiving her?). She also wears a blue-colored clothing, which means she's depressed.
The next scene shows her old friend explaining that the weather is sunny with a chance of clouds. Her hair is also yellow, which means she's happy while wearing a pink-colored clothing, which means friendship/affection/inner-peace. This means she has been mentally supporting the main character from the start and her "aunt" must've noticed and killed her. But the reason is still unknown.
This is the part where the "aunt" finally shows her true colors. The scene shows the "aunt" cheerfully introducing a new product then proceeds to feed the main character with it. This shows that the "aunt" is really drugging her.
Unsolved Mysteries: 1. The girl with the glasses' hypnotization. 2. Her "aunt" handing over the No. 1 Medal. 3. Her 3rd yellow-haired friend which now has a orange hair. 4. The mermaid.
Soda City Funk
Theory: In the vibing scene, her clothes color changed to white, which means purity/innocence. This means she is not resentful and bitter anymore as she was in Ghost Town, Two Time, and City Love (red).
In the character select scene, her "aunt's" clothes changed to red due to the main character finally fighting back. And the main character's clothes are now yellow, which means she's happy. Happy to finally end her suffering that her "aunt" inflicted to her.
The three cakes are her and her friends. Red for the main character, yellow for her yellow-haired friend, and green, for her friend with glasses. Since cakes are sweet, this means her past is not bitter anymore, but sweet because she can finally escape her bitter memories that haunts her.
The next scene shows two tarot cards: The Fool and The Lovers. The Fool refers to the main character while The Lovers refer to (maybe) her friends or her.
The falling cakes scene shows whats inside the cakes. The yellow cake's insides are peach, meaning that her yellow-haired friend is a good friend to the main character. While the green cake's insides are yellow, this means that her friend with glasses, is happy/peaceful inside because she finally escaped the pressure her family is doing to her. The pink cake, has green and strawberries inside. Meaning she is finally at peace but still sour.
The mirror scene, where the words "I have changed, I miss those days", refers to when she was little. Living bitterfree, and no problems, unlike her current situation.
The "Do you wish to turn back time?" pops up multiple times with a planet spinning in the middle. It refers to her current situation, which is remeniscing her painful past over and over again. This also makes her smoke as seen in Two Time, Ghost Town, and City Love (red).
The sandwich stacking in the background of "Check it out" scene refers to her 5 friends. The Yellow-haired, The girl with glasses, the orange-haired girl, the black-haired girl, and the blue-haired girl.
The glasses reflecting rainbow refers to her reflection which is a combination of divine anger and patience.
Also, her friend with glasses wear a blue t-shirt with a yellow vest. Meaning she is hiding her depression.
The last scene shows that she mustered all her hope to stand up and abandon her painful past.
Unsolved Mysteries: 1. The "sorry :(" scene
If I missed anything, tell me down in the comments. If my sentences are messed up, then I'm sorry, I'm not good at english.
Thanks for f2pbadluck for helping me in the theories.
submitted by oop_and_groose to RDRs_theories [link] [comments]


2020.09.20 09:27 DryBison My [32/M] father [57/M] is frequently in and out of the hospital the last few years due to a heart condition (and a variety of health problems), but his obsession with QAnon and vocal disgust towards myself, my wife and my brother, has me feeling like cutting him out of my life is my only option.

TL;DR my dad has a history of emotional and physical abuse, and an obsession with QAnon that consumes nearly all of his time and energy, and is the only thing he talks about. After a public freakout in the hospital, things were said and I don't fee comfortable having him in my life any longer. Wanting to know if this is the best decision, as he has immediate health concerns and little to no support outside of family.
My dad and I have had issues for a long time, going back to when I was 12. He struggled with alcoholism and was emotionally and physically abusive to my Mother (which I discovered years later). He had moved out and bounced around doing odd jobs for years, and around 5 years ago was effectively homeless. He was living in an old school bus in a friend's backyard. He was hospitalized around this time and that is when we found out how he was living, and offered to let him move into our spare room.
Now, my dad has always dabbled with conspiracies but the degree to which he was involved was unclear because he was always vague about them. Often he masked his interest as just being a "history buff". He's also had a tough life having dropped out of high school as a freshman, and making a living out of odd jobs. When I was growing up he had a legit gig at G.E., but when they laid a large portion of their employees off in the '90s, my Dad was never really the same. Cue the abuse, which wasn't directed at us as much as it was our mother. Though there was an incident where he smacked me a few times and called me "stupid" because I failed a test in 6th grade.
My dad always claimed to be a man of "reason" and "science", and in 2016 he revealed his support for Trump, we had a small falling out as I said it was embarrassing for him to support someone that doesn't represent the qualities he claims to value most. Him and my Uncle had a more severe falling out around this time, that was probably more of a tipping point than anything. This is something I could live with though, however disappointed I was. Eventually we got him government housing and set up for benefits so that he could live independently since he could no longer work.
In the ensuing years I realized, after he joined Twitter, that he was heavily involved in QAnon. He had joined several Discord servers dedicated to it, and in every conversation I had with him he would talk about the "research" he was doing and working on "documentary" projects that would go onto YouTube. I was more aware of this as a conspiracy theory trend at this time, but focused on the positive. He was connecting with people over a common interest, I should be happy about that, right?
He's got lots of issues with depression, and while he never went sober, he has managed his drinking and has been responsible with it. He doesn't contact me himself unless he's in the hospital, or it's been awhile since he's heard from me. I have a wife and 2 children, work full time and go to school full time, so it's very hard for me to hold up communications for everyone on my own.
So when he does call me and he's not in the hospital, it's mostly to guilt me about not contacting him more. And he'll talk about how he loves his family, and wants to see his granddaughter's more, which is something he expects me to facilitate for him and never reaches out to set up a time to come by himself. If I don't arrange it, he won't be around.
My younger brother moved back home, his relationship with our father is even more strained. Because of Covid, only one of use could visit him at a time in his most recent stay, which has been more serious than previous ones. During this visit, during one of my father's rants about QAnon, he noticed his heart monitor spiking and decided to plead with him to give up this obsession, and that he's alienating his family. He said it didn't go great, but hoped he made him think.
A few days later, I'm going up to the hospital thinking about having to have a conversation about what to do if he doesn't survive the next hospitalization. A conversation that no one wants to have with a loved one, I'm sure.
After a few minutes of updates about his condition and treatment, he brings up that my brother had "complained" to him about his QAnon hobby, and then quickly escalates into him angrily proclaiming that no one can tell him what's true or not, and he won't be manipulated. I was caught off guard by his sudden fury, which immediately reminded me of when he had smacked me around for failing that test in 6th grade. I could see in his eyes how serious and angry he was.
Then he went on about how people were stupid and lacked intelligence anymore, referring to my brother. I said "that's your son you're talking about", and he didn't deny it and retract anything. The rest of the conversation was heated and became a blur. I didn't try and debate him or challenge him, but begged him to understand that this wasn't good for him, that it's all he talks about and he has no discernible interest in our own lives. He didn't seem bothered about not having any idea about us personally, our beliefs or hobbies or anything. Our conversations are always about him, and his problems are never his fault.
I asked him if this was the most important thing to him, and he said something to the effect of "yes, and with whatever time I have left I will see this thing through". He told me he was disgusted by things I supported like Black Lives Matter, and went on a fairly disgusting tirade about it being a "marxist organization" with "ties to the middle east" and something about transgender people. I told him "I hope that this is enough for you" and left. He was shouting and calling me names (I distinctly heard "bastard"), which you could hear through out the medical ward.
Since then I've blocked his number and blocked him on social media. My perspective is that this is effectively the same as him joining a cult, and I have a family that I have to think about and right now he's not someone I feel safe or comfortable having around, especially with my girls, who are still pretty young (both under 4).
I know this is a long story, but the advice I'm looking for is if this is the right decision? People I know have been supportive, including my grandmother (my dad's mom), whose advice I value more than anyone. Without my brother and myself, my Dad has no one else locally to support him, except for maybe his own friends (not many). Though he clearly has no respect for me, my wife, or my brother, as he said some particularly gross things about his time living with us.
submitted by DryBison to relationship_advice [link] [comments]


2020.09.20 09:18 SoCalGuy1972 TIFU by trying to impress a girl

Let me set this up for you: I have ASD (specifically Asperger's). I have severely maladjusted social skills and a penchant for going way overboard when it comes to letting a girl know she is loved. Another lovely side effect of my disability is I'm a massive nerd with a thirst for knowledge, and I like to study things. I practically grew up on Jeopardy!, so I was that kind of guy at work that cared less about hip-hop and more about trying to enjoy my life and provide little tidbits of information.
Anyways, about 15 years ago I started a temp job at Mercury Insurance. There was a girl at work named Sylvia. Sylvia was a bronze-skinned nearly 30 year old Latina beauty, she was half Brazilian and people were talking about nerd facts so I brought up about word origins and how in Americana, you gave a peach to anyone you liked a lot, hence the caption "you're a real peach".
So one day Sylvia comes up with a 200 lb. black woman named Tyesha and Tyesha was talking trash "When are you gonna give Sylvia a peach?", it was the middle of January and I honestly didn't think to check the grocery stores, only a local supermarket that my mom used to shop at called Wolfe's (Wolfe's actually closed in 2018 after 101 years in business, however, the back room where sandwiches and salads are made is still open).
So me being a smartass give my mom two words: canned peaches. So my mom buys a can of peaches and some stuff from Hallmark, including wrapping paper, string to make a bow and a bag like I'm presenting her with a major gift. I even went online to get a picture of an anthropomorphized peach and referred to Sylvia as "Miss Peach 2006" in the letter and state that fresh peaches were out of season. Had I bothered to check the grocery store, I would have seen peaches from South America were in season, but my mom was very old-school and figured I would have had to wait until the summer to get peaches.
So the next day I come into work with this bag with my present and around 9, I present it to Sylvia and say "here you go!", Sylvia was completely confused as only Tyesha and I knew what was in the bag and Tyesha was 50 shades of surprised that I went as overboard as I did with it being in her words "all nice and wrapped". Sylvia even asked me what it was and I said to her "No, this is only going to be fun if you open it". So Sylvia starts opening the package like she's trying to defuse a bomb, very cautiously and carefully.
When she unwrapped the package, she was trying her very best not to laugh at how badly she got punk'd. She held up the can and stated "It's a can of pea-ches!". Everyone in the department did not have to hold in laughter and laughed for a good five seconds at how I managed to go completely over the top on this girl. She even went down into the room where I was working a full hour and a half later looking at me funny, so I decided to stir the pot and say "You know, Sylvia. I think you're a real peach". She tried to say "Thank you" but was still laughing under her breath. One of the guys even came up to me and said "that was magnificent, man. Good job!"
Unfortunately, a grade A prank like this attracted the attention of some particular spoil sports in HR and I was called off the assignment a week and a half later without an explanation given. Worse, Sylvia was married, she just didn't tell me. So in the end, I didn't get the girl but I did get a laugh that I can share with my family and friends about how much I tend to go overboard with someone who I enjoy the company of. :)
TL;DR: I pulled a massive prank that went perfectly, and garnered many laughs but the HR department didn't quite have the same sense of humor as the rest of the company.
submitted by SoCalGuy1972 to tifu [link] [comments]


2020.09.20 09:06 redlightserenade Granny's House

My parents have been divorced since I was 5 and my brother was 2. Growing up, my dad had to live with my Granny a couple of times because he was financially irresponsible. I also lived with my Granny for a bit when I was 20 after she broke her hip (I became a CNA after high school). My brother and I are terrified of Granny's house, though.
It all started when we were little. We would always sleep on an air mattress in the back room of the house. It was like a second living room or maybe it's called a family room? I don't really know. But the room was behind the kitchen and I remember that when the lights went out it was so dark you couldn't see your hand if you put it in front of your face.
One night I woke up and couldn't feel my brother sleeping next to me (little man was a furnace and I could always feel his body heat radiating off of him). At this time I was 8 so he was 5. I was always afraid of the dark at my Granny's and got scared when I realized my brother wasn't in bed so I got up to go find him. I didn't have to go far. As soon as I walked into the kitchen and turned on the light I saw my brother just standing there; his back was to me.
The layout of the kitchen is a little weird so I'll use this time to try to explain. The best description I can think of is that the counters are parallel to each other so the stove/ oven/ microwave were on one side and the kitchen sink and refrigerator was on the other side. And at the very end of the parallel kitchen was the laundry room. So since my brother's back was turned towards me, he was facing in the direction of the laundry room. The laundry room door was always kept shut but when I found my brother in was wide open.
Even with the kitchen light on, though, the laundry room was pitch black. Even though you couldn't see anything in the laundry room my brother was staring at it. I finally asked him what he was doing and he said, "I'm watching them to make sure they don't come out and scare you. They always give us the dreams that make us cry."
It's important to point out that both my brother and I have had the same recurring dreams at our Granny's house for years. My dreams were different from his but they were always the same. I would always dream that I was in my Granny's house alone and a huge rush of ancient Native Americans would attack the house. I would always hide in a different spot in the house but they would always find me and carry me off right before waking up. My brother would always dream that he was being eaten alive by ants. His dream would always cause him to wake up in the exact same manner. He would wake up kicking and touching his arms like he was swiping something off of him and he'd scream "GET THEM OFF ME" over and over again. And even though I knew he had those dreams often I would still rip the blanket off of him thinking it would be the time the ants really got to him.
I told my brother that I didn't see anything but the dark but he assured me they were there. He then held his arm straight out and pointed at the laundry room and said "there's a lot of them standing and looking at us. But don't worry they know I can see them now. I'll protect you now that I have powers."
I didn't ask anymore questions but I bet that they were Native Americans. We live in Arizona so it wouldn't be far fetched.
Between that time and the time I moved in with my Granny my brother and I still had those dreams. Also between those times our grandpa passed away. So when my Granny broke her hip and asked me to move in for a bit, my grandpa had already passed. The day I actually moved in, my Granny had one more night in the hospital so I had the house to myself. Everything was fine until I turned the lights off. I didn't have any dreams or anything but I woke up at 3am feeling like I had dirt in my mouth and desperately needed water. The water was in the kitchen. The kitchen where the laundry room is. The laundry room where the fucking things who have my brother and me nightmares that made us cry. But strangely that wasn't even what I was afraid of. I was afraid that when I turned on the light I would see my grandpa sitting at the kitchen table like he always used to do.
So what did I do?
My dumb ass kept my eyes closed all the way to the kitchen, not turning on a single light, only running my hands along the wall to make sure I didn't run into anything. But I had to open my eyes to grab a cup and get the water from the fridge with only the fridge light illuminating a small portion of the kitchen. I tried to only focus on my hands by my brain loves to self sabotage so naturally I glanced at the dining room table to see not only the silhouette of my morbidly obese, deceased, grandpa sitting at the dining room table, I ALSO of course saw a few other silhouettes alongside side him.
I ran so fast to my room turning on every light I could reach on my way there and stayed awake until my Granny came home from the hospital.
Shit had me spooked but I love my Granny so much I suffered through similar things the entire time I stayed with her.
submitted by redlightserenade to ParanormalEncounters [link] [comments]


2020.09.20 09:05 SpaceCat2500 I (14F) think my best friend (also 14F) is trying to...out-emo me...

I know it sounds stupid, but here goes. I’ve known my best friend since we were seven, we grew up together, and entered a gothic phase in fifth grade because we were fans of Five Nights at Freddy’s and Yandere Simulator at the time. During that time, I was interested in Yandere Simulator, and kind of went through a mental illness glamorizing phase (one I’m not proud of) while she liked FNaF. She eventually got me into it, and that’s when I became the ten year old equivalent of edgy, like her. So basically, she got me into the phase.
However, as we’ve gotten older, I’ve started to fit the “edgy requirements” better than she was- and it isn’t a competition or something I had been actively observing, but just something I’m noticing while I try to figure this out. I think the “competition” started when I sent her some memes about “edgy” bands as a joke, and wrote, “If you don’t get this, you’re not really edgy” because I...expected that she would. She got passive-aggressive with me, but I thought nothing of it. Then another time, I told her on the phone that it was funny how she was like my mother, and she liked rap and R&B, which she does, whereas I was like my father and liked rock and metal. She kind of brushed me off.
One time, I told her that a girl complimented my style (which is literally just basic egirl shit, and I was just wearing a black sweater and jeans the day of) she replied with, “I get that a lot. Welcome to the club.” The only problem I had with this was that...she was going to a uniform school, says she doesn’t go out, and whenever we go out together she doesn’t “dress edgy” she just wears a t-shirt and sweats. It kind of felt like she was trying to compete with me.
Recently, she’s been making jokes and saying that instead of playing baby music for her child if and when she ever carries one, she would play death metal. I replied with, “Do you even listen to death metal?” And she doesn’t...I didn’t mean to be accusatory, but I guess that I was, because it seemed to piss her off. She references death metal and wanting to sing it at karaoke, play it for her baby, etc. constantly, and I always reply the same way because I don’t like it when people lie about themselves to fit an aesthetic.
But the icing on the cake is that she’s started blatantly lying to me. I believed it at first, but it’s becoming questionable.
Here’s the order- I mentioned my tarot cards and how I’m trying to read them more often, she told me that her mother cheated on her boyfriend and the guy she cheated with died and that her boyfriend’s mother was a psychic and that the dead boyfriend cheated. Then that she went BACK to that same psychic when she was pregnant (you know, the one who’s son she cheated on) and that apparently, she was angry in the womb.
I mentioned that I learned a new My Chemical Romance song a while ago, she told me that her uncle new Gerard Way and that he was at his wedding. I thought that was really cool- and I believed it.
We were talking about the state of America, and I said, “The subliminal mindfuck, America.” To reference the Green Day song, and she told me that her mother was an avid Green Day fan and crowd surfed and lost her shirt and got to go backstage. Sounded believable, kind of. I went with it.
I recently started reading “Interview With the Vampire” by Anne Rice because I used to have an imaginary vampire boyfriend and still really like vampires- she told me that her mother used to text Anne Rice and that her family could send them anything to get signed. She claims that she saw the texts when she was little. I asked if they could send in my book, she said that they probably couldn’t. She refused to ask.
She claims that her mother new fucking Kurt Cobain and Courtney Love, I didn’t recognize his name at first, and she absolutely crucified me for it.
She told me that Shanna Moakler’s daughter follows her on Instagram because again- her mother knew them too. However, she told me that if I went on her Instagram- I wouldn’t be able to see it. Needless to say, I went on her Instagram and Alabama’s, and she wasn’t following her.
I don’t know why she keeps using her mother to make these claims- but she is. She got me into gothic culture, but I’m the one who acts the part, fits the stereotype, and listens to the music. She listens to Cardi B and other rappers I don’t know the name of- she jumps on me any chance she gets to be “more edgy” and I really don’t want to compete...I need help-
TL;DR: My friend lied about her mother having connections to celebrities and tries to force alt culture on herself to seem edgier than me and I’m getting tired of it.
submitted by SpaceCat2500 to TeenagerAdvice [link] [comments]


2020.09.20 08:53 Winniepg Kit didn't know if he wanted to keep acting by the end of GoT

So the interview is fairly extensive and focused on what he is doing now while also reflecting about GoT. Seems like the break has been really good for him and his time away from the show was needed. It would have been a shame if he stopped acting.
Kit Harington: 'I feel that emotionally men have a problem - and it stems from the Second World War'
Game of Thrones' Jon Snow opens up to Gavanndra Hodge
There was a time, not so long ago, when Kit Harington, the brooding, battle-weary hero of the global television phenomenon Game of Thrones, considered giving up acting. He had spent eight gruelling seasons and nearly all his 20s playing Jon Snow, who, in the final episode of the show, has to kill Daenerys Targaryen, the woman he loves, because she has become an unhinged tyrant who thinks it's OK to incinerate thousands of innocents with her massive dragons.
Harington wept at this scene during one of the cast read-throughs. "I cried a lot in the last season, just out of sheer fatigue," he says. "But I was feeling pretty emotional that day. I think it was more to do with Emilia [Clarke, the actor who played Daenerys], more about the people around me and the story coming to an end."
We are speaking in a photographic studio in Hoxton, the roast chicken that Harington's assistant has fetched for his lunch cooling on the coffee table between us ("I can't eat and talk"). He looks box-fresh, just like the black T-shirt, grey jeans rolled up to mid-calf and grey plimsolls he's wearing; his shaggy beard is trimmed, his shoulder-length warrior ringlets shorn away.
It's a little strange to meet someone and be surprised that they look like they've recently showered, but we're more used to seeing Harington smeared with the roiling mud and blood of Westeros, so this general vibe of buffed well-being feels new, as does the laid-back grace with which he approaches being interviewed (in past encounters he has seemed rather tense and reserved - channelling Jon Snow a little too hard, perhaps).
It turns out that Harington, 33, has had a good lockdown. He and his wife, the actor Rose Leslie, who, as the wildling Ygritte, claimed Harington's on-screen virginity in a thermal spring in season three of Game of Thrones, decamped from their north London home to their 15th-century house in Suffolk in March.
"I did not set myself the task of writing the next big novel or learning an instrument, and failing," he says. "I gave myself a break from the get-go. I took the opportunity to reflect, to sit with myself, and for the most part that was what I achieved."
There was lots of gardening, he says, reading and exercise. Sometimes he and Leslie would get dressed up in their fancy red-carpet gear for dinner, just to add variety to existence, and she was the one who cut his hair.
They even found themselves performing impromptu comedy skits for each other. "We would be walking around the house playing scenes and doing accents. Two actors locked up together will end up performing for no one."
He wasn't able to act during lockdown, but he was able to process the 'intensity' of the past few years, during which seasons of Game of Thrones were interspersed with parts in films such as Pompeii, Spooks and Testament of Youth, and theatre roles including Doctor Faustus, his fame ratcheting ever upwards from drama school newbie to global six-pack pin-up.
"It has been interesting - going through lockdown, getting over this TV show, where by the end of it I didn't know if I wanted to be an actor any more, coming out the other side, living with another actor. I realised that I actually miss my craft, I miss what I do. It's a nice revelation."
Harington was brought up in Acton in west London until he was 11, when his family moved to Worcestershire. His father, David, was a businessman; and his mother, Deborah, was a playwright, a teacher of creative writing and now an artist.
"I idolised my mum," he says. "I followed her around the house. It was because of her that I wanted to be an actor. She used to take us to the theatre at least twice a week." But Deborah Harington didn't only teach her sons (Harington has an older brother, Jack, who lives in Dubai) about the transformative magic of the stage; she also introduced them to gender politics.
"I asked for a Mighty Max and she bought me a Polly Pocket. I asked for an Action Man and I got a doll - it was very gender fluid from the word go. And I went with it," says Harington. To this day masculinity and 'inherited male trauma' are the themes that he is most interested in exploring with his work.
"I feel that emotionally men have a problem, a blockage, and that blockage has come from the Second World War, passed down from grandfather to father to son. We do not speak about how we feel because it shows weakness, because it is not masculine. Having portrayed a man who was silent, who was heroic, I feel going forward that is a role I don't want to play any more. It is not a masculine role that the world needs to see much more of."
He is, of course, talking about Jon Snow, the role he won soon after graduating from the Central School of Speech and Drama, where he was mostly cast as 'a pre-pubescent boy' and had to grow a beard before audiences would accept him as a man. Snow fitted the Jungian archetype of the hero - loyal, steadfast and honest, a man who fights for the underdog - and as such he became the moral core of a show where for the most part immorality reigned.
Harington admits that he is "not all those things", despite what fans may imagine, but he did bring something of himself to the part, "a certain self-reflective, introverted broodiness".
'Thrones', as Harington calls it, was a vast ensemble piece, and despite the unsettling regularity with which well-loved members of the cast were bloodily culled, deep bonds were formed. "The first season was wonderful, the freedom of it, everyone just had a great old time, because no one knew what the hell we were doing. In the second season we suddenly knew that whatever we were doing worked, we knew that we were on to something good."
But it was the third season, he has said, that was his favourite, filming in Iceland and working closely with Leslie. "She has this energy on camera, she really gives everything of herself," he says. "I mean, look, I fancied the hell out of her and I was falling in love with her, so she could have been the worst actor in the world and I wouldn't have seen it... But obviously she is a brilliant actor and very easy to work with."
He describes the end of Thrones as a kind of grief, or like the end of a relationship. "You know that elated feeling you get when you are walking down the street and you realise that you haven't thought about your ex-girlfriend in a while, and you go, I think I am getting over them. I am at that place now and I am really happy."
He does not even have any Thrones memorabilia at his home in Suffolk, no filched bearskin rugs or pewter goblets. "F-k no, I don't want to look round my home and see Thrones. The place is medieval enough." He does have some paintings that fit with the thatch and the timbers, but these are real relatives rather than fictional ones.
"I've got a portrait of a Lady Harington from 1603," he says. There are distinguished relatives on both branches of the family tree, Elizabethan nobles on his father's side, and the Catesbys on his mother's. Harington played his ancestor Robert Catesby, the recusant Catholic ringleader of the Gunpowder Plot in the 2017 BBC miniseries Gunpowder, created by his own production company.
"I don't place a huge amount of importance on family lineage, but it is quite cool to look back and discover stories about these people." He is disappointed that lockdown meant he was unable to make a planned episode of My Grandparents' War, the Channel 4 documentary series in which celebrities learn more about their relatives' wartime heroics, although it is hoped that this will be picked up again.
Projects that Harington did manage to complete include guest-starring in an episode of the David Tennant-led police drama Criminal for Netflix, and playing a character called Dane Whitman in the new Marvel film, The Eternals.
According to my investigations, Whitman is a descendant of an Arthurian knight called Sir Percy of Scandia. He rides a horse called Aragorn and wields a blade called Black Ebony. Sadly Harington can neither confirm nor deny any of this intel. He can't even tell me if he gets to wear a cool superhero outfit. "I've lost count of how many NDAs I've had to sign," he says.
He can tell me about his other cool outfits, though, many of which are by his favoured label, Saint Laurent: "I love the clothes they make. They are a natural fit for me, not loud in any way, very classic, fitted and sleek."
Sleekness is maintained by a regime of running, yoga and workouts. "I need to keep fit, I've got an overactive brain, I need to do something in the morning to get the endorphins going." He has tried meditating, but says he is not very good at it. "I am not a very relaxed person, in honesty, I am a bit ADD, I can't sit still anywhere for very long. I move from place to place. My relaxation is movement."
Another way he clears his brain is by writing poetry: "Bad poetry - it's more like getting things out of my head." These strategies are working, though, and he says that he feels "a lot more centred now, and that is a really satisfying feeling... it has taken years of work, but we all do that, it is a process of growing."
The work continues. He says he recently returned from a week in Wales: "I went to this cabin on my own, just to get out, to be in a different place. I had no signal or Wi-Fi or anything, it was just me and the sheep." While he was there, he read The Dispossessed, the science fiction masterpiece by one of his favourite authors Ursula Le Guin. "There is a brilliant passage about suffering, near the beginning: I have a photo of it on my phone."
Harington spent much of the final season of Game of Thrones in tears, but he seems to be in a far better place now. I ask him when he last cried. "I cried last night. I was chatting to a friend and we were talking about the idea of things not staying still, of not being able to stop time. You know, when you are like, 'This moment is perfect, why are we still moving on?'"
https://www.telegraph.co.uk/luxury/mens-style/kit-harington-feel-emotionally-men-have-problem-stems-second/
Edit: Here are the pictures from the article because we all deserve to see the pretty as well https://twitter.com/BestofKitH/status/1307568852977369088
submitted by Winniepg to FreeFolkNews [link] [comments]


2020.09.20 08:50 leeal70 ugh. [Trigger Warning. a bunch of potential triggers]

please note that i'm not asking for diagnosis with that title. i just want advice. there are a whole slew of potential triggers here, more than just suicide ideation. that one just seems the most extreme. i am 16, by the way.

ready to go?? okay.
so- my life hasn't been great. i can't even remember all of the things that've happened to me. i've just deemed them as "not that bad", and said "others have it worse". this is because of a combination of passive neglect from family (they tended to just hand me electronics to keep me busy), severe bullying that's caused multiple bouts of severe depression and suicidal thoughts, constant worry about my mother's battle with cancer, and many bouts of friend group strife and collapses (the most recent of which sent me through 5 or so months of endless depression, with sudden bouts of crying and mood swings from the stress), i've developed a whole number of things that i can only assume is CPTSD.
as for my symptoms... chronic dissociation (derealization, leaks into depersonalization under very bad stress & negative emotion); intrusive suicidal thoughts, which can get worse depending on how i feel; a very persistent feeling of emptiness, a void only solved by constant interaction with other people (which is hindered by terrible social anxiety, even online); inferiority complex, which makes me feel uncomfortable around those i see as 'superior' to me; constant inability to focus. sometimes it gets so bad i start misspelling words like "allowed" as "aloud", or mixing up things i'm trying to type. changes in tandem with dissociation; mood swings, sometimes quite severe if exposed to a bad trigger; avoiding things or people that remind me of trauma, and attaching strongly to things that helped me calm down; emotions numbing under stress, which can be very worrisome if i notice it happening, only making things worse. this is how i typically shut down during arguments or attempts to access my problems with friends; terrible trust issues. even with friends i semi-trust, i still always dread the day that something horrible will come out of the woodwork, vilifying me and making everyone hate me; an absolutely abysmal self image, i can't even look in the mirror without depersonalizing; terrible working and explicit memory (only my implicit/feeling memory works okay. this includes triggers); what feels like alexithymia, which can cause bouts of unexplained, sometimes even profuse crying even if i feel consciously fine. more often, it causes me to explode in anger or clam up, if a trigger subject is brought up; a frequent one—somatization (mostly twitching, sometimes neasea), as well as somatization of health anxiety worries; and a whole slew of triggers of varying severity, that, while not necessarily causing flashbacks, will cause any number of things to happen, like me blowing up in anger, suddenly switching to a depressed mood, or having intrusive thoughts about things i really want to just forget and live down at this point; oh, did i mention health anxiety? that, big time. every other month, i'm worried about something new, and every other week i'm irrationally terrified of getting sick. lastly, i also suffer from what i can only describe as intrusive rumination. often, embarrassing things i've done, both on and offline, will pop up in my head at complete random, making me cringe at them. sometimes they resemble flashbacks, but most of the time, they're just really intrusive, but short-lasting thoughts.
my story is down here. just skip it, if you want.
at first, when i was only 8, maybe even younger (dissociation has absolutely wrecked my chronological memory), it started with constant dissociation, of which is still chronic derealization. this came from physical abuse from my father. my bullies knew this, so they'd constantly attempt to get me in trouble, as in trying to get me 'red lights' for 'misbehavior', to see me break down in tears from knowing my dad was going to beat me. each time was worse than the last, but thankfully, my mom stopped this early on.
after that, all i know is that my dissociation was so terrible that, combined with ADHD issues at the time, my memory was completely dysfunctional. i distinctly remember resenting my family; i thought my mom didn't care, my bigger sister was too mean, and her boyfriend didn't understand me. i shut myself away from not just them, but everyone in school. around this time is also when i caught a very severe stomach bug, which i initially thought was from food poisoning; as such, i became anorexic for a whole year, and still had terrible health anxiety about food and germs in general, which lingers to this very day.
then middle came around. my sister's boyfriend recommended a close by school, which, unbeknownst to him (i think?), was absolutely riddled with bullying issues. i don't remember specifics, but that period of life was also hell. and around that time, i met my first friend group. from that, i suffered my first grievous loss; my friend, i'll call their name Adam, suddenly vanished without a trace. turns out, their parents had found out they were talking online to strangers, and being the helicopter parents they were, took away their internet. i only found this out because last year, they popped on for a week one last time to tell me. never seen them since. but back to school- i was always made to feel like i wasn't "black enough", that i was weird for liking nintendo, that i was weak because i didn't have pain tolerance, or i wasn't strong enough, or that i was stupid and a failure for not being able to understand or remember math. my self-esteem took another nose-dive here, and combine this with the instability of my online friendships at the time, i was, again, subjected to months and months of misery.
around this time is when another few friend group catastrophes happened. i used to follow others around, instead of making my own paths; but, this came at a cost. i almost always attached myself to narcissistic and other toxic people. when one of my closer friends- let's call them "Cade", decided they gotten everything out of me, they cut me off. incensed, i ranted and raved to everyone i knew- only to find out that many other people who were friends with him resented him just as much as i did.
skip forward again, enduring constant abuse from a friend i suspect has BPD nowadays, for who knows how long... i make it into another friend group. this time, made by my efforts; a few people who were previously associated with Cade, a few from roleplay games i used to play on ROBLOX when I was younger, and a few who associate with those two groups. for a time, things were happy, i finally felt at peace, but... i was still a ball of unrestrained, anxious fury. i was nosy, brash, sometimes even mean. i didn't know why, myself; all of this trauma was still a scrambled ball of black scribbles in my head. but, confirming my suspicions, it wasn't but maybe... half a year later, before things collapsed, again. because of well-crafted lies from two people i'll just name Ben and Black, combined with the combined mental trauma & life problems everyone else was going through (that i didn't even know about), i was ejected again, this time without any hope of even trying to defend myself. only through sheer determination and desperation, did i manage to claw things back together- albeit, in a much, much worse shape than before.
and now, i'm facing relationship issues because of my mood swings, because there's someone who actually cares about me as a person. everyone around me has either maligned me, or didn't care about my existence. i don't know how to handle being "liked", nevertheless "loved". i can't even see therapy at the moment, thanks to the stupid virus.
TL;DR, um, hard to TL;DR all that, but my life's been a trainwreck so far. just, a very silent one. typing all of that really hurt, if i'm being honest
submitted by leeal70 to CPTSD [link] [comments]


2020.09.20 08:47 NerdyGothGirlPlus 34 [F4F] Vancouver/Online looking for feels and flirts!

Hello!
My partner and I are moving into poly land (not our first time at the rodeo, no need to fret) and while they’ll be doing their own thing, I’m here doing mine!
I’m in my mid thirties, rather curvy, pretty tall at 5’9” and have black hair with straight bangs. I love to tell good stories, and have a lot to tell be it hilariously bad dating adventures, fun stories of foreign travel or highly embarrassing childhood experiences!
I also enjoy going for walks, tinkering with electronics to make cool gaming things, reading about the history of languages on Wikipedia, and daydreaming about the tattoos I want but never seem to get.
For the kink world, while I switch, I naturally fit being a submissive better. But can I be a service top? You betcha!
I’m looking for a long term dating partneFWB - while love is always on the cards it’s not the aim, so I might not be the woman for you if you’re looking to settle down!
Anyway, I’d love to hear from you! Online is great, local is better as we could eventually meet :)
submitted by NerdyGothGirlPlus to polyamoryR4R [link] [comments]


2020.09.20 08:42 salviasagecreations I think it’s safe to say I’m obsessed with orange and black and I am loving making Halloween pieces 😭😭🎃 my drop is tomorrow so excited !!

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2020.09.20 08:29 defamatory-ghost 16F; need new people to talk to!

hi! i go by the name vi and i’d love to have a stab at making new reddit friends. i’m looking for someone to talk to when i need a break from life, and anyone that’s nice and can keep a convo going i’m good with. here’s some fun stuff about me: - i really really love rock, punk, and alt music (nirvana, nine inch nails, black flag, mcr) and will listen to anything you recommend me - i live in california (yes, literal hell) - i’m learning how to play the guitar and i already know how to play bass and piano - i’m very very liberal and i probably won’t get along very well with a super conservative person, no matter how nice :(
i’d prefer to talk on discord or instagram, but you can just pm me on here first!
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2020.09.20 08:28 compens8ting just a vent no one asked for

well it's about 2 am and i had an embarrassing experience so now i'm feeling pretty low really low not suicidal low but just sitting in the dark in bed wishing everyone you know can just forget every aspect of you in their mind low. not wanting to be a functional human of society low because you feel like an embarrassment and a mistake everyday.
i'll be honest i don't really know if i have avpd. i do relate to a lot of aspects of avpd but i'm sure everyone does in their life. i'm only 20. a couple years ago i learned about attachment styles (the way you interact w others based off how your parents interacted with you as a child) and found out i have avoidant attachment because of my upbringing. i was an only child for 8 years, wasn't allowed to have play dates with friends as a kid so i grew up pretty alone and had to find company within myself and stuff like the gamecube. i'm also black, so when i was in middle school and started having mental health issues, i kept it to myself because god forbid you're black (caribbean) and mentally ill. so now i guess i've grown into this young adult that has a bad habit of refusing to ask for help because of the embarrassment of people knowing i need help. i'm extremely emotionally self sufficient. i've never had any romantic relations with anyone cause of the fear of me becoming dependent on them and i guess them letting me down. i also haven't had a good example of love growing up so i guess i'm nervous of not lucking out in that dept. i also have very bad self esteem and body dysmorphia lol. i've spent my teenage years diving into escapism. from stanning 1d at 12 years old, various artists in between, to now a kpop stan. i grew up using twitter to escape real life and my real thoughts. i have a tendency to make myself busy when i don't wanna feel sad cause being sad feels really lame.
i guess what throws me off about whether or not i have avpd is the fact that despite what i go through internally, you'd never know if you met me. of course they do say the saddest people are the ones always cracking jokes. (is that too corny) i'm a (kinda) loud aries. i'm really ugly so my personality is obviously my best trait. i'm a little quick witted which leads me to having a smart quick mouth. i'm the jokester in the classroom and among my friends, so having this internal battle makes me feel like an idiot sometimes. what sucks about it is when you do try to ask for a small piece of help but no one responds the way you want them to, or they make it a big deal and make you feel like as the "mentally competent" one, you really shouldn't have problems.
i rambled a lot. like i said i had a bad night. i guess in my heart i do wanna tell someone the way i feel but i feel i can't get therapy till i move out. so i have decided to be a menace to the reddit subscribers or whatever. i do wish there was an option to turn off replies or something cause this is embarrassing on the low ahaha.
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2020.09.20 08:17 Nauvengamer [The Prince of Demons]-Chapter 4.1 Lessons Learned

First Part: here

When I woke up, my head felt like I had slammed it into a grinder. I opened my eyes, and it was just agony. Lord of Fate, why does this hurt so bad. Of my poor ideas, forcefully taking the was a terrible one. The sensation after was uncomfortable and just awkward.
I looked around the room, and saw my incredibly relieved mother watching over me. She seemed to have the world lifted off her shoulders when she saw me start to move. It felt like everything was spinning. Practice this one when I plan on taking the next day off for now.
It felt like my brain had been severed from my body. I moved my tiny body around, and tried to get a grasp on my . The sensation had a peculiar crispness to it. My felt different than before, or at least the way I moved it seemed sharper. A noticeable effect after that little? Either really pays off or the is a top notch . I mean the gift was from Solomon, so it was probably a top notch . While this sensation sucks, that is definitely worth the investment.
I activated my . It was about the same as before, no real noticeable changes. My mom at this point had deemed it was time to smother me. She hugged me so tight I could barely breathe. That was probably a bit more reckless than I realized, or at least terrifying for my parents. It was getting difficult to breathe, she was hugging me so tightly.
Dumb. Lux insulted. Okay, I will try to be less reckless in the future. I also think I have enough things to keep me busy and should avoid seeking trouble.
*
The next year passed in a flash. Nothing overly exciting happened, just alternated practicing my , , , and my . I still couldn’t beat Lux in our morning play. She learned and adapted way too fast. Just you wait, you smug little beast, you will cower before my might!
The only exciting thing that happened I didn’t even get to see. Nox and Nez got married, but as I was a baby my parents were worried about me crying or getting restless in the ceremony, so I got to spend it surrounded by ten guards in a secured room.
Nez started training me for as my parents were keen on me learning it. It involved him using little flashcards with pictures, showing the idea behind how worked. I wish I could stare him dead in the eye and say I understand every word you are saying but that would raise some flags. From what I could grasp, was the of nothingness, it had a few interesting properties. It could be used to nullify other or cut through effects such as . How it worked I was trying to grasp. Nez I feel was laying down some sort of building blocks or ideas that were super basic to how it worked. He would only use baby words around me and refused to give more than explanations like Nothing ! and make the empty! The only thought going through my head was EXPLAIN FURTHER WHAT YOU MEAN NEZ! WHAT ON TENEBRAE DID EITHER OF THOSE MEAN?! That was a mystery to decode.
My mom was pregnant again. To my knowledge, she was three month along. I am going to be an older brother. I wonder what having a sibling is like? My body was much more mobile now, I could walk with no problems. My speech improved immensely, but I had to actively make sure to speak like a child. I opted to remain quiet a lot to avoid accidentally using sentences that were too complex. I need to read on the subject. The library is vast, there is bound to be a book on being a sibling. Maybe. But then I couldn’t read on or . Or how to or objects. Crap. If it was not so difficult to sneak away from Nox and Nez to the library. Those two watched me like hawks at night. I want to sneak to the library! It is not a crime! I will not live in such a repressive regime! I shall be free of such oppressive tyranny! I shall read those books as much as I want! It also served as a practical demonstration of Nez’s . He loved using it to stop my cold.
Currently, I was plotting my next escape attempt. Nez was being a dirty cheater and put a pre-emptive around me. Nez was currently sitting on Nox’s lap, and the two of them were being awfully flirty and honeymoon couple like. It was nauseating to watch. Oh look at us, we are all happy together and romantic. We are such a happy couple! Look at how much we love each other! Supportive and kind to each other. I probably wouldn’t have been as bitter about it if it wasn’t for the fact while being so lovey-dovey they effortlessly thwarted most of my escape-to-the-library attempts. The combo of and was honestly pretty terrifying, and highly effective at crushing the escape attempts.
I practiced my in these moments. My head always felt like it was thrown into a grinder after practicing, but after the horrific sensation faded my connection with always felt better. My was slowly improving as well. It honestly improved the slowest of all the things I trained. I could observe with some difficulty, and always got vague sensations of events to come. They were always weird, general sensations like I would see a bird, or one piece of a meal would be cooked a specific way. Honestly, it needed serious improvement.
When my head felt like it was about to burst, I gave it a rest. The problem with is if I pushed it too far it led to immense discomfort. No matter how many times I experienced it, the sensation was horrible, and I just could not get used to it. That peculiar emptiness was horrific.
I was getting ready to call the night as Nez’s were invincible as far as I was concerned, when I ran through my normal final checks. All was normal until I reached my . I could see small lines running through the , which were a very translucent grey color. What are these?
The lines pulsed and webbed throughout the . I looked around, and saw a thicker line running from Nez to the . Hold on. I formed my , which was it’s usual black color. I focused on a nearby blanket, and ran to it. The appearance was quite similar to the one from Nez to the . It’s his . It is the he infused in the . I did notice Nez and Nox taking a slight interest, having sensed my . Observant uncles.

I willed my to try and copy Nez’s. Nothing. Nothing ! and make the empty! were the crap Nez always spouted. HOW DO I DO THAT? Become translucent grey ! You got this. Come on , become grey like Nez’s! You can do it! Yea that was a long shot. is nicknamed Nothing because it is a complete absence of . It is essentially pure which is a large part of the reason it is so good at dispelling other . Do I pull the color out of my ?
It had to be better than talking to my like it was a dog. Am I going a little crazy from having to act like a baby? I need to keep an eye on this. After staring at the rope of I created for several minutes, the tip started to slowly turn clear. I could feel sweat dripping down my brow after continually pulling out my natural . My uncles were watching me closely, curious as to what had my attention. I am going to bust out of here. Putting up your cheating . After a solid twenty minutes of effort, I had maybe two inches of what I believed was .
Lux? I asked, trying to stir the fast asleep beast. She yawned, and glared at me for waking her.
What? She asked, her bell like voice tense and annoyed.
Get ready to attack my uncles. I instructed. She looked quizzically at me, but nodded slightly to let me know she was ready.
My uncles at this point were starting to get up, knowing I was clearly up to something. To put it gently, Lux was generally best left asleep; she did not generally take being woken up well. I launched the clear end of into Nez’s on the side of my uncles. After it impaled itself into the , I forced as much of my through it as I could. A massive surge of crackled through the air, before the shattered. Lux launched like a cannonball right at my uncles as I away. I quickly up into a small enclave, and laid as far in as I could. I tried to conceal my presence as best I could as well, a difficult task given I had no idea how it really worked. My body felt considerably drained. It’s okay, I think I have successfully escaped my uncles. I thought as Nox materialized in front of me, glaring at me. Damn. I should have committed to the Library. Might have been hard for how drained I feel.
“Little brat. Never can give up, can you?” Uncle Nox asked, glaring at my exhausted body. I want to but I just don’t have it in me.
Uncle Nez appeared on the edge of the enclave, with a floating Lux behind him. Nez excitedly rushed over and picked me up, lifting me above his head. Why is he happy I tried to escape from them?
“You did it! It was rough, but that was definitely ! You are learning!” Uncle Nez claimed excitedly.
“Are you going to praise him for him yet again trying to sneak into the library at night?” Uncle Nox asked.
“He just wants to learn, that is not a crime. Plus he just used ! Who’s the best little nephew!” Nez replied in a baby goo goo gah gah voice.
My Uncle Nox let out a long sigh. Nez and Nox brought me back to my room and laid me back in my crib. I will succeed tomorrow you blasted uncles; I shall read in the library at night! Lux was set next to me, clearly disappointed at the lackluster escape. I let out a small huff as I went to sleep, consigning myself to trying again tomorrow.
*
I woke up, and was brought by my mom to breakfast. My uncles were talking with my dad and Cesar. I could hear Nez discussing my success using last night. My mom and dad both looked very eager, and Cesar just let out a sigh.
“How did he use it?” my mom asked, setting me in my chair for breakfast.
“My adorable little nephew here used it to force his into a and shatter it for his little escape attempt.” Nez explained, using his baby voice while pinching my cheeks. I am an adult mentally! STOP WITH THE BABY VOICE AND CHEEK PINCHING! I CAN ONLY TOLERATE SO MUCH MORE OF THIS!
I tried to swat him, but my little toddler body still lacked the speed and coordination needed to so much as graze him. My mom and dad laughed at my little swat, and asked Nez some more details, which he happily provided.
“I did want to ask your Imperial Highnesses one question about Nil’s teaching.” Nez asked my parents.
“What is it Nez?” my mom asked.
“Do you know what he is wanting to ask?” my dad asked Nox who just shook his head.
“Can I start teaching him more seriously? You asked me to keep his teachings suitable for a toddler, but I believe he is capable of more. He does read a lot in the library and I think he understands more about than we realize. I feel like teaching him the way I am is just hampering his growth. I think his immense talent is being squandered at the moment.” Nez replied.
“We are aware, Nez, it’s just we are worried about his exceeding what his body can handle. Last time he was given even remotely direct training his grew dangerously fast and he kept injuring himself with it.” my mom replied.
“I have heard, but can we do a small test trial? He has been constantly training his and his so his should have a long way to go before it gets dangerous for him. He also has that he has been steadily getting better with which can help take in any excess .” Nez retorted. Go Nez! Hit them with that logic! PLEASE!
“I don’t think it would hurt.” my dad chimed in, to which my mom shot daggers at him. Nox looked at Nez with an ABORT MISSION face. Do not give into tyranny Nez! You are my only hope!
“You are quite bold today, Nez.” my mom snarled. Nez flinched for a second before continuing.
“Empress Senna, I understand that Crown Prince Nil is a precious treasure, but don’t you want your precious little gem to shine as much as he possibly can?” Nez countered.
My mom’s face contorted into an expression I didn’t recognize. My dad and uncle's eyes went wide. Way to go Uncle Nez! She opened her mouth to say something and then stopped. My mom just let out a deep sigh.
“I guess it couldn’t hurt to try a small trial of teaching him more seriously.” my mom replied defeated.
“How about a week? I will teach him seriously for only a week and see how far he grows?” Nez proposed.
“Only a week.” my mom replied quickly.
Nez smiled and nodded in agreement. To my knowledge, he was the only one able to win in arguments against my mom. Cesar, Nox, and my dad all just flew the white flag when she began to dig in her heels. Breakfast ended soon after, and Nez took me for my lessons. Helga followed us diligently, still watching me just in case an attacker could over power Nez somehow.
Nez set me in the child seat, and pulled up his blackboard where he normally drew his crappy little lessons. I wonder what his serious teaching is like? I was bouncing up and down, wondering what his lesson was going to be like.
“Okay Nil, I think it’s time to try and get you to form pure . You came close last night, but you can do better. Now try and form Nil.” Nez chided.
I formed a ball of , which was black. After struggling for ten minutes, I managed to drain all the color out of it, making it the translucent grey that Nez did. He observed it for a second, then with a quick flick of his wrist shot a needle of his into it causing it to dissipate in an instant.
“Not pure enough. Formation was weak and took too long to convert from your innate .” Nez lectured.
“Sir Nez, aren’t you being awfully harsh on the Crown Prince?” Helga interjected.
“Nonsense, he isn’t going to learn if we coddle him. Nil here is a practical demonstration of how to form .” Nez lectured.
Nez formed a ball of red , and then it turned almost completely clear. He took his ball and threw a needle into the ball, and it just embedded itself, not dissipating the ball. Nez dissipated it all, and then formed another ball of red .
“Sir, what are you doing?” Helga asked.
“Nil will understand. He used his to copy the of my poorly formed , rather than following those explanations I was giving him. I am showing him as I think he will learn faster through mimicry than theory at the moment.” Nez explained.
“Nez is best!” I chimed. Uncle Nez is teaching me for real! Wait a second, did he intentionally make the like that?
“Now Nil, when you are trying to remove your to make , you are not thinking about this the right way. Now, like this requires you to turn your natural into the type of you are trying to perform. As you have a very pure , you cannot change your to match my innate for example, it limits you to a with a neutral alignment. For , try making your into nothingness. Imagine converting your to an emptiness. Remove the sensation of yourself from your , now try again.” Nez explained, as he kept flickering his orb of from red to clear on command with ease.
I formed an orb of again, which was black with my . How do I convert my to be clear? Or turn my into nothingness? I watched Nez do another demonstration. His seemed to effortlessly flick between being red and colorless. Wait a second. It was flickering; all at once. I stared at the orb my uncle had made, and stabbed some into it, trying to get a sense of what it felt like. My quickly dissipated as it hit it, but I got a feeling of how it worked. I turned my head towards my orb, and willed it to feel similar.
The orb turned almost translucent, it was an incredibly light grey; definitely better than before. Nez threw a needle into the orb, and it stayed formed much longer before eventually breaking apart.
“Much better! Now do it again!” Nez cheered with a small clap.
Nez spent the entire three hour session making me form orbs over and over. By the end, my was completely exhausted. The last orb was the clearest one I had made; it lasted nearly five minutes before the needle of dissipated it.
“That was an excellent session Nil! Now remember to practice your and before our session tomorrow!” Nez instructed as he left.
Helga bid Nez farewell with a bow as he left the room. I formed a miniature orb as he was leaving, forming it to be an entirely clear ball of . Nez whipped around and threw a needle at the small ball. It buried itself into the ball, but seemed to dissolve upon contact. Nez smiled and continued to leave.
“What was that sir?” Helga asked.
“Nil finally formed pure . Make sure he does train his and today before he takes a nap.” Nez explained with a grin.
Helga nodded with understanding before returning over to me. Nez you taskmaster. Not that I am complaining, I formed ! A basic ball, but it was still ! Now I needed to learn and , which I think are the same thing. Not sure, but from what I could tell from what I read in the library they were. I stretched out to take a nap, to which Helga made a tsk tsk noise. Fine, I will do those two before I take a nap.
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2020.09.20 07:49 yourtypicalcoolguy Old black and white movie where man is searching for his friend. Finally finds him. Turns out he’s a criminal.

Old black and white movie. Man goes to a foreign country to get a job from his friend. When he arrives, it turns out his friend is supposedly dead. Everyone who knows the friend tells a different story of how the friend died. The man grows increasingly suspicious about his friend’s death as he falls in love with the dead friend’s girlfriend. Turns out that the friend is not dead but is faking his own death because he was involved in a crime. The man makes a deal with police to convince friend to turn himself into the police. The final scene is the man chasing his friend, who he (the man) ends up shooting.
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2020.09.20 07:41 cheerypotatos Ready to Rulu omg

Got my ready to Rulu black joggers today from a fb resell group and holy s**t I’m in love!!!!! They’re fitted and also casual. Being a pear shape I always feel like joggers make my hips look super wide but not these! Thank you to all who recommended I go w my TTS 6 from my previous post!
I’m 26” waist, 38.5” hip and 5’7” for reference - 6 fit me perfect!! Want these in other colors 🙂
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2020.09.20 07:40 Foreign_Paramedic865 Time of Estimates.

-time of impact-
Before the gates opened to the way to the hill.
Like someone already knew. The time. Everyone was different back before time had been like a dimension without space. People were different in all ways. You could say 'hey' and no one could reply or would. Weather it be the Weather or day no one knew time better than the spirits of the lost realm. The Earth. So lost in it's complex ways and shapes. Before time existed there were many times of conflict. Always in a way before the signs and possibilities. Who would know the difference between a lion and a transformed lizard.
The complex nature of Gene mutation has caused a distant relationship between the physical and non physical realm. All beings encountered on the surface of the planet have no relationship with one another. The underbeing dwellers have the instance of life but yet lack interest in it. All which are equal will always be considered a threat to al which is created. All are treated the same and no one not even the top of the missle toes can become one with their flesh or blood. The mutation has caused a triple in the growth rate and all beings respect time but have little design in their genes to act upon time and place. They react like animals.

Chapter One.

When time was before the instance of reality it became space. A distance in which one could decipher the hidden meaning to what could be known as a time dilation. This is the conflict between two instances in time. This is what is perceived in two areas of space with a warp in all perspectives around its origin. This is Madness and this is Time. What angers the souls on the surface is this idea. That space cannot be controlled by one being. All beings deserve to understand the instance I am in has less time than usual or unreal reality. This is based upon the views of the undermining dwelling society of the underground community. That they cannot and will not for the love of the creation help the surface society to become more in tune with their senses. And of course time.. With all things and beings apart of one design one community we can free the One.

Chapter Two.

In the complex space between both the surface and under the surface there is relationships that do not only talk but interfere with the upper circle in the mists above. This is forbidden in all ways as these keepers of the Time have no access to the interspace or dimensional field of which exist on the surface and under ground. This means Two Things. One thing is that a monster exist in one field. Another thing is that there is a pressure on both fields because of this. Respectfully speaking this is madness. Time cannot exist with all of this Madness. I write to the number Three and Possible Entity or PEM/F under the surface as a note to access a database to file a claim to the interspacial revelation program we have. Whoever finds this note will be able to access a key locational field energy on the surface if it is accessed with a precaution and notice of advance maintainance and design. Remember Three, do not access the surface Grid unless you are with One.


Chapter Three.
This is the final point of which I must return no knowledge to the Creator. I must send the note before the time has returned to Z and the 26th member of the conflict arises with a Ego. I must return all beings to the original point of time in which they exist with One and Three. Do not forget the point of Access and Design. We let the underground Community know that the Surface Society has no return to all beings on the surface which means, no being can return to the origin underground once interacted with a surface society member. This is what makes this very difficult, but with Time know that there is a reason 4 everything. Like A Book or Page this note will provide you with the Design to stop the Black eyed and red eyed Entities that presume and associate love with fear in others. This is not the mission but objective. Find One and Don't forget Three, The Design is only on your time.

Sincerely, Gozmo
To:Three.
2.
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2020.09.20 07:35 Raichu10126 Recap of Marine Corps Officer Interview

I had my interview 9/08/20. I’ve been busy with some things so I have not gotten a chance to post about my experience my apologies.
First of all, thank you to everyone on this page who responded to my original post it means a lot you took time out of your day to provide me advice. That’s one of the reasons I love the Marines, there is such a strong bond and need to help one another I know I made the right choice in branches.
Now onto the interview. I wore a blue suit, white shirt, and red tie with an American Flag lapel pin and black dress shoes. I made sure I got my hair cut, beard trimmed and nails cut prior to going. They complimented me on my look and said I looked professional.
I was 10 minutes early, I entered in and was greeted by a female captain. I sat down and watched a Marine Corps Officer manifesto video which was amazing and super inspiring! I knew they were watching so I insured my back was always straight, I never slouched, and I took copious notes while watching the video.
After it was done I was asked what I thought of the video which I was totally amazed by and spoke very favorably of the manifesto video.
I was then introduced to the master sergeant who was interviewing me on the side the captain primarily spoke to me but I knew the master sergeant was looking at my demeanor my body language and assessing me from the side.
He questions I was asked was why the Marine Corps why the officer program and aspects about leadership. When answering them, I always made sure I looked at both the Captain and Master Sergeant I suggest you do the same to make sure that he or she doesn’t feel ignored. They like the fact I said that the Marines are the police power of the world they are essentially the guardians and they like the fact that I talked about my philanthropy and the importance of helping others who cant help themself. They asked me what is the most important aspect of leadership I said accountability is the most important aspect the master sergeant said I was the first person to ever say that and he even agreed that was the most important aspect I have I said that’s accountability is important because you’re accountable for yourself, the organization, and of course your squad and unit.
I also talked about the demeanor or swagger that comes with being a Marine versus Other branches. They like the fact they use the word swagger.
Then I was presented cards of different qualities attributes and benefits that come with being in the Marines - I was then asked list them in order of what I found to be most important for me. Personally things about growth development, integrity, being the best you can be, being an excellent citizen were the most important - aspects I tend to put things like tuition reimbursement G.I. Bill etc. towards the bottom because for me personally it’s not that important. I also talked about my shortcomings I am 28 years old and I’m going to be 29 in a few months I was very open about that they told me I can get a waiver if needed they then asked me about how I’m staying in shape I told him I was a 215 pounds and I’ve gone down to 150 pounds I want to ensure I was at my BMI weight prior to joining. They appreciated the dedication and they asked me things about my PFT currently how many pull ups push-ups crunches planks and my run time I was honest about it and I suggest you be to when you’re going to the interview.
After majority of the questions went through they seemed pretty interested in the master sergeant and asked me a question. He said in the Marines you might move around a lot to different stations in different sections me (the applicant) Could be his boss, he then said what would you say to me if I ever became his boss? And I told him I would ask you what do you need for me and I remember both the Captain A master sergeant get a double take when I said that and said that I was the first person To answer that question like that and they’ve jumped on board for me to sign up.
I then Had to do paperwork I asked my birth typic it my drivers license and Social Security I also suggest you bring your passport just in case I had an issue with my birth certificate bring your passport just in case and have four form is ID just to be safe. They told me about what the fitness regimen will be for me expect all officers to run 3 miles in under 24 minutes it is expected you get at least a 235 in your initial PFT and prior to the board around 270 which essentially means perfect pull up perfect planks for sit ups and a pretty strong run. I was very open that I’m not the strongest runner because I messed up and had shinsplints for the longest that was partly due to poor form and bad running shoes they appreciated my honesty.
You have two weeks to do with known as the rough packet this includes having your time to sign off on a document stating that you won’t need dental work in the next year getting five letters of recommendation getting a police background check listing any traffic offenses you had an a 100 word essay and employment history. You have two weeks to get a complete packet done they are lenient on things that are expected for someone to get you such as the police record the dental record letter of recommendation and college and or high school transcripts but still be prepared to get that done if you know you’re going to make it through the program I highly suggest you have five people 5 to 7 people already picked out and who’s gonna write your recommendation letter start getting your transcripts I talk to your local police department on how to get public record it was a pain in the ass for me to get my background check.
When you go to The office, I think it’s important to bring a notebook with a pen and paper take copious notes and repeat back what they said to you if they say it’s a lovely day say yes it’s a lovely day it shows that you’re paying attention to what they’re saying take notes and if you need rehashing to repeat what they had to say I didn’t get to ask them questions they quickly pushed me to do the paperwork but have some questions prepared for that I don’t ask the newest questions like about payroll and the G.I.
Be confident but not cocky understand that they’re selecting the best candidate and they want people that are strong but humble confident and composed and of course care about the virtues of this nation and people who just have a need to protect and help people. Bill asking for questions like what was the I had my interview 9/08/20. I’ve been busy with some things so I have not gotten a chance to post about my experience my apologies.
First of all, thank you to everyone on this page who responded to my original post it means a lot you took time out of your day to provide me advice. That’s one of the reasons I love the Marines, there is such a strong bond and need to help one another I know I made the right choice in branches.
Now onto the interview. I wore a blue suit, white shirt, and red tie with an American Flag lapel pin and black dress shoes. I made sure I got my hair cut, beard trimmed and nails cut prior to going. They complimented me on my look and said I looked professional.
I was 10 minutes early, I entered in and was greeted by a female captain. I sat down and watched a Marine Corps Officer manifesto video which was amazing and super inspiring! I knew they were watching so I insured my back was always straight, I never slouched, and I took copious notes while watching the video.
After it was done I was asked what I thought of the video which I was totally amazed by and spoke very favorably of the manifesto video.
I was then introduced to the master sergeant who was interviewing me on the side the captain primarily spoke to me but I knew the master sergeant was looking at my demeanor my body language and assessing me from the side.
He questions I was asked was why the Marine Corps why the officer program and aspects about leadership. When answering them, I always made sure I looked at both the Captain and Master Sergeant I suggest you do the same to make sure that he or she doesn’t feel ignored. They like the fact I said that the Marines are the police power of the world they are essentially the guardians and they like the fact that I talked about my philanthropy and the importance of helping others who cant help themself. They asked me what is the most important aspect of leadership I said accountability is the most important aspect the master sergeant said I was the first person to ever say that and he even agreed that was the most important aspect I have I said that’s accountability is important because you’re accountable for yourself, the organization, and of course your squad and unit.
Then I was presented cards of different qualities attributes and benefits that come with being in the Marines - I was then asked list them in order of what I found to be most important for me personally things about growth development, integrity, being the best you can be, being an excellent citizen were the most important aspects I tend to put things like tuition reimbursement G.I. Bill etc. towards the bottom because for me personally it’s not that important. I also talked about my shortcomings I am 28 years old and I’m going to be 29 in a few months I was very open about that they told me I can get a waiver if needed they then asked me about how I’m staying in shape I told him I was a 215 pounds and I’ve gone down to 150 pounds I want to ensure I was at my BMI weight prior to joining. They appreciated the dedication and they asked me things about my PFT currently how many pull ups push-ups crunches planks and my run time I was honest about it and I suggest you be to when you’re going to the interview. After majority of the questions went through they seemed pretty interested in the master sergeant and asked me a question. He said in the Marines you might move around a lot to different stations in different sections me (the applicant) Could be his boss, he then said what would you say to me if I ever became his boss? And I told him I would ask you what do you need for me and I remember both the Captain A master sergeant get a double take when I said that and said that I was the first person To answer that question like that and they’ve jumped on board for me to sign up.
I then Had to do paperwork I asked my birth typic it my drivers license and Social Security I also suggest you bring your passport just in case I had an issue with my birth certificate bring your passport just in case and have four form is ID just to be safe. They told me about what the fitness regiment will be for me expect all officers to run 3 miles in under 24 minutes it is expected you get at least a 235 in your initial PFT and prior to the board around 270 which essentially means perfect pull up perfect place for sit ups and a pretty strong run. I was very open that I’m not the strongest runner because I messed up and had shinsplints for the longest that was partly due to poor form and bad running shoes they appreciated my honesty. You have two weeks to do with known as the rough packet this includes having your time to sign off on a document stating that you won’t need dental work in the next year getting five letters of recommendation getting a police background check listing any traffic offenses you had an a 100 word essay and employment history. You have two weeks to get a complete packet done they are lenient on things that are expected for someone to get you such as the police record the dental record letter of recommendation and college and or high school transcripts but still be prepared to get that done if you know you’re going to make it through the program I highly suggest you have five people 5 to 7 people already picked out and who’s gonna write your recommendation letter start getting your transcripts I talk to your local police department on how to get public record it was a pain in the ass for me to get my background check.
When you go to The office, I think it’s important to bring a notebook with a pen and paper take copious notes and repeat back what they said to you if they say it’s a lovely day say yes it’s a lovely day it shows that you’re paying attention to what they’re saying take notes and if you need to repeat what they had to said. I didn’t get to ask them questions they quickly pushed me to do the paperwork but have some questions prepared for that I don’t ask the newest questions like about payroll and the G.I. Bill asking for questions like what was the toughest experience why did they choose the corps, what was the hardest thing for them to do etc. Also keep a clean line of communication with them.
Good luck to anybody and feel free to reach out if you have any questions!
submitted by Raichu10126 to USMCboot [link] [comments]


2020.09.20 07:31 escott1998 Facebook friend shared a post that didn't sit well with me.

One of my classmates from high school shared a post on Facebook that said "If your kids make all A's, go to college, buy a house, and never meet Jesus then it's all worthless." I don't mind religious people at all. After all, I'm a black girl from Texas so it's expected. But even when I was religious post like that never sat right with me. I felt like and still feel like it's a big "fuck you" to every person who died never knowing who Jesus is. Believe it or not but some people never heard of Jesus because maybe their family or country they live in forbids reading the bible. Or they grew up in a household that was told that Jesus was just a prophet or didn't exist. Some people view Jesus like how Christians view Muhammed or Buddah. My other issue is that post like that makes God seems like a narcissistic sociopath. You're telling me that God would tell his children that their life is worthless because they didn't accept his son? What's even the point of free will if that's the case? What rational, loving parent would tell their child that? It really disgusts me seeing those "Jesus is the only way" post. So by that logic, all the Jews in the holocaust went to hell while Hitler, a catholic could go to heaven? Really sick if you ask me. My mom isn't religious anymore, she still believes in some type of God, just not any religions. But, when she was she always made it a point to tell me growing up that some people are born into different cultures where they follow other religions and thats okay and to recognize that everyone is valid and to never bully or put anyone down because of their beliefs. My mom was badass
submitted by escott1998 to atheism [link] [comments]


2020.09.20 07:05 TheDIsSilentHilbilly Ultimate PES 21 MyClub Companion Spreadsheet!!! - GUESS WHO'S BACK?

DOWNLOAD SHEET HERE - PRESS FILE THEN MAKE A COPY TO USE
DO NOT, I REPEAT, DO NOT, REQUEST PERMISSION TO EDIT
PLEASE REMEMBER TO CLICK FILE MAKE A COPY, YOU CAN'T EDIT IT OTHERWISE!

BACK BY POPULAR DEMAND! The Ultimate MyClub Companion Sheet is back! For the uninitiated, this is a spreadsheet I have been building on for the last 3 years that is a brilliant aide for managing your MyClub account. Contained in the spreadsheet are three tabs;
  1. The 100% Scout Sheet
  2. Player Experience and Contract Cost Calculator
  3. Trainer Experience Table (The unloved one)

100% Scout Sheet
This sheet allows you to find out every player you can use your free scouts from matches to sign with 100% regularity. When you combine scouts you narrow down the player pool that you can sign, if you combine the right scouts, you can pinpoint one player and one player only to sign. That is a 100% player.
I have written fairly detailed instruction on how to use this sheet on the sheet itself. I have also used Klostermann as an example of how the sheet works.
I have all Gold, Silver and Bronze/White players who reach 86 or higher 100% spins on the sheet. Also included is a popular tab from last year for the top potential players. Here the spins are not all 100%. You have to clear a player pool. To do this, sign the lesser players in the pool, lock them and keep them in your club. Once you've signed all the other players in a player pool, you are then guaranteed the player that's left. I have limited the number of other players in the player pool to 4 but I am open to extending this in a future update.

Experience Calculator and Contract Cost Sheet
Thanks to u/WannaFuckLoli (no, seriously) , this tab is now perfect. Previous versions have been inaccurate at high ages, levels and base ratings. These have now all been corrected.
This tab will help you calculate how much experience a player needs to reach a certain level (be it his max level or just an arbitrary level you choose). Just fill in the players age, rating at level 1 and your desired level change and the calculator will display exactly how much experience is required.
This tab also has the contract cost calculator to show you just how much GP you are losing using all those black balls!.

Trainer Experience Calculator
This sheet calculates the base experience any player in your club will give if converted to a trainer (base experience being the displayed number before the multipliers are applied). This, coupled with your companion website of choice, should allow you to decide how much to train duplicates before converting them into a trainer (I've found it's much better to train to level 10 or 20 than just turn them straight away).
This tab can go very unloved but is vital when working out how many duplicates you need to make sure you max out a player you're training.

Finally - I have added a donation link
Before you all murder me as a money grabbing twat - this was requested by users of the sheet. I know times are tough for lots of people at the moment so I'm not asking for donations but if you feel so inclined then I will love you forever and really, that's priceless. This is also not some horrific precursor to a Premium spreadsheet that you need to pay £5.99 to unlock, this sheet will always be free. I build it to help others and myself enjoy the game a little more, and yes, to show off my insane Excel tekkers. Paywalls can suck my balls (bars). If you do want to donate, I have set up a Paypal me link, paypal.me/TheDIsSilentHilbilly Please don't kill me for this!

As always if you have any questions, please leave them below and I'll be happy to answer.
Stay safe and in groups of less than 7 (if you live in the UK)
Hilbilly

As if you made it all the way down here without clicking on the link - here is the link again
submitted by TheDIsSilentHilbilly to WEPES [link] [comments]


2020.09.20 07:00 Shadowninja0409 21[M4F] Florida - looking for clingy girl to fill a hole in my life

Appearance: White, chubby, black hair, brown eyes, 5’11, 170lbs Why I’m here: Looking for someone I can trust and be equally as clingy with. Tired of feeling like it’s never mutual, I’m always the one that’s chasing after someone and being ignored. About me: I work doing drafting for an architect, watch anime and in my free time play video games like valorant, breath of the wild, and some other stuff, I love to go and hang out (pre-Rona) with friends and bowl, golf, and do whatever we find fun. Hope someone responds and wants to chat, that would make me happy even if it doesn’t work out :3
submitted by Shadowninja0409 to r4r [link] [comments]


2020.09.20 06:58 NoGoodDM Hair too long for dress code

A few years ago, I was a department manager for a large conference center. I ran the top-performing department (as determined by guest feedback surveys) by a LARGE margin. Like...no other department out of 1200 employees was even close. And my dress style was always nice and professional. Dress code didn’t say we needed to have on button-up shirts and ties, but I did it anyway cause I looked great and professional, and I met with the leaders of large conferences multiple times per day. I dressed to impress. They were my clients, and whatever their problem was, I was going to fix it. My demeanor and professional attire did great things to alleviate their concerns.
My bosses got on a dress code kick for some reason. They made me and my small department (6 people total) start wearing lame colorful standardized shirts with a logo on front. (The rationale was that the clients should be able to identify me as a staff member - I get the logic, but that was what my lanyard and name badge were for.) Plus, the bright/colorful dress-code shirt was actually detrimental to my work, as I often worked backstage as a tech during band performances (industry standard color for techs is black. But they wanted me to wear bright yellow...okay...) I tell them my concerns for my shirt’s bright colors being a distraction for the audience as I do work backstage. My bosses don’t care, they made up a new dress code and want me to follow it. Fine.
So I wear the shirt. But then I also wear a nice sweater vest (or just a vest) on top it. Still got my tie on. I like ties. But, to make it explicitly clear I’m staff, I get my own hat made (at my own expense too) that shows the company’s name on it. Again, my badge and lanyard are always visible. But now I can do my backstage work without being a distraction to the audience that might glimpse my movement as I go about doing scene changes, etc.
But then my bosses tell me that the company’s logo has to be visible on my shirt, and I therefore can’t wear a vest. So then I get the company’s logo embroidered on my shirt’s sleeve, also at personal expense. Problem solved, right? I’m wearing the shirt they gave me and the company’s logo is visible.
At this point, my boss is pissed at me and is trying to write me up for any possible infringement of company policies. I know how to read a room, and I immediately start going to the HR director to approve of my new and evolving malicious compliance’s of this ever-changing dress code policy.
My boss says that we can’t wear hats. Okay, fine. My hair is visible for all to see...and I quickly become aware of the next thing my bosses are going to tell me to fix. My hair. They’re going to cite some vague language in the employee handbook about hair length. So I go to the HR director preemptively and ask for clarification for hair length. After a 10 minute conversation, we both agree that I am perfectly fine with nothing to worry about. My hair is nice, in a bun, and looks good. It’s well kept and stylish, and my specific clientele actually really like it because they’re mostly hipsters anyway.
But my bosses don’t see it that way. They say that my hair is too long and needs to be cut. I ask them how long is too long. (I am, after all, a rule-follower and will obey the rules.) One of my bosses (a woman with long hair, hair that is actually against dress code because it’s not put up into a bun) says that my hair should be less than shoulder length (my hair was in a “man bun”). I ask her if that policy extends to woman as well. She says no, obviously, that this dress code only applies to men. Apologetically and feigning ignorance, I ask her to show me where it says that in the employee handbook. She shows me the section...the section where it says that if the hair is longer than shoulder length (regardless the gender) it should be kept in a bun. I tell her that my hair is in a bun, as opposed to hers.
Oh man...now it’s getting real. I just called them out. They’re not happy. My other boss (a guy with super short hair, less than a quarter of an inch long) tells me that as a guy, my hair shouldn’t touch my shirt’s collar. He tells me that a few stray hairs of mine are touching my color. I pull out my phone and take a picture of him. I show him that even his 1/4” hair is touching the collar (his head was leaned back and his hair was touching his collar.) I ask them again to clarify how long is too long, because his 1/4” hair is too long for their standards.
Side note: I love my thick hair. Someone telling me to cut it arbitrarily speaks fighting words.
Then they tell me that I just need to do what I’m told because it’s company policy, and if I don’t do it, they’ll get HR involved. I tell them I already got HR involved, and the HR director explicitly told me that my hair was perfectly fine.
But these two bosses of mine just wouldn’t let it go. They had to go after my hair.
They told me that since I’m a manager and meet with group leaders, I have to go above and beyond what the dress code says and I have to act professional in order for us to receive good guest feedback regarding professionalism. I tell them that me and my department are already the most professional and highest rated department according to guest feedback surveys. I take the printout of the survey results out from my bag (because I anticipated my “lack” of professionalism was going to be questioned and had it printed in advanced) and I show them the survey. They read it, toss the paper aside, and tell me to cut my hair or be written up.
Fine.
The next day, I come into work with a shaved head.
They never told me to cut my hair again, because I look FAR WORSE with no hair. Coincidentally, they also let me wear my hat again, haha. But only because my shaved head was a sore sight
...
As a point of interest, when I resigned from my position a year later, I submitted to HR my 80-point paper why my two bosses caused me to leave the organization, how they stifled me and my department from doing legitimately good and quality work, and how I felt that under their “leadership,” I was incapable of ever winning. A month after I left, I heard from a friend and previous co-worker who was still at the company that my direct boss was forced to retire, and my other boss was fired. My friend told me that they were privy to a conversation held between the CEO and my female boss (the one who was fired), and my friend overheard the CEO say, “Your time here at this company is over. And I want you to know, that when you’re gone, your position will not be filled. Consider you and your position eliminated.”
Lastly, I haven’t cut my hair since I left (apart from occasional trims.) It’s now almost 3 feet long, and I plan on giving my gorgeous lion’s mane away to some charity that deals with making wigs for kids.
submitted by NoGoodDM to MaliciousCompliance [link] [comments]


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